New Year's 50/50

Sunday, January 2, 2011 7:00 am

The brainchild of Scottie D., and nearly his unravelling in last year's inaugural edition. Nobody deserves this. Personally, I was so deep in the hurt locker last year, I didn't thaw out for about 2-3 days. Attrition rate was approximately 70%. Got me a nifty bottle opener for completing the assignment (and just used it seconds ago).

If your name is Brad "the Snowman" Trans-I-owalter, you probably need this meager level of suffering. If your excuse out includes the phrase "I haven't been riding...", save it. If you have scheduled a colonoscopy immediately before or after, shame on you. For the rest of you, lemme 'splain how this works: The goal is to cram 100 miles of cycling, divided into the referenced formats, in to one of the shortest (and coldest) days of the year. If you are lucky there will be a bowl of soup and a cup of coffee in between. If you are real lucky they will be warm. Useful daylight is estimated at 10 hours, 7am to 5 pm. That equals 10 mph, including stops. Everything else is bonus time (or night riding). In that vain, the ride proceeds with much haste, and without dilly dally. It is always advisable to stay near the front. As it helps keep the pace rather spirited, poaching is encouraged. Some 50/30, 30/50, 30/30, just 30 and just 50 groups may form. 30 miles is about 50 kilos and so we'll let it slide. Thus, you, cracker jack cyclist, can notch your musket with the ole' 50/50.

A few big questions:

Who will keep the co-ed classification alive?
Who will go DNS out of the gate this year, Metro, or No-Showalter (or both)?
Who will bring Scottie D in?
Who will finish the secret Stage 3?
Who will host?

We will narrow the details in the coming weeks. Meanwhile...I leave you with LAST YEAR's tutorial on how you work this out on the home front. (Note some minor details have changed).


Sir Tony Brown sets the tempo in the road stage of the 1976 edition of the New Year's 50/50

Where cycling fails...

...skydiving succeeds!

(3 minutes well spent!)

Here to Lay Pipe.

Mtn Foz rides virtual brown jersey to victory!

To live all three days you must be there all three days, and those who made it happen were not disappointed. Chad handily took the stage & the mustache to jump out to a commanding 3 minute lead as drunken debacle of a prologue Friday night paved the way for the Saturday ITT. After Chad abandon the brown jersey Saturday morning, Metro rode the virtual brown to a stage victory, edging out TB by a scant 20 seconds, and Foster by a mere 10 more. Scottie D. abandoned under suspicious circumstances, and was therefore a non-factor, giving rise to rumors that he may have failed doping control. Metro took an apparent GC lead going into Sunday's road event. However, a bit of a scoring error Saturday night had erroneously given the jersey to Metro, when it was Foster with a narrow 11 second GC margin over the bearded messiah. Where beer & a pencil had failed, coffee and the laptop picked up the slack.

Day 3 thing got right interesting, as Metro texted in his early abandonment just as Chad & Scottie had before him. It seemed like wrapping up Biketoberfest down at the Mega Bike Mart was a little more important than having your name tattooed on the human trophy what is Browntown glory. Thus it was Foster riding Day 3 in virtual brown, with Winborne a couple of minutes behind, and Peter in third. Christan & Foghorn rounded out the GC, and Frank & Jeremy offered neutral support.

Protest by local farmers in the first kilometer saw the narrow country road clogged with farm implements, diesel duallies and flat bed trailers. Riders snaked through to the first gravel section and started to size each other up. Frank went out early with a flat. Each successive hill and headwind offered the opportunity to shed another drafter. With a final few swigs of Browntown Brown Ale in the water bottle, Foghorn used home course advantage & knowledge to continually attack the hills, wind sections and gravel roads to shed all chasers to a solo victory. Winborne rode the wheel nobly (on a mountain bike) but finally cracked inside the 15K banner, and was overtaken by a late charging Foster inside 5K for runner up & the overall win.



As always, a huge thanks to people like Amy & Shannon Black and Amy Waters, for allowing us to crash their pads. Pibby donated prizes of marginal all the way up to substantial value. And thanks to everyone else who brought a little something to contribute to the party. Last but not least, Foster & Jeremy brewed the beer, so raise a pint to those guys.