The problem with a Spring Classic, is that it occurs in the spring. Therefore, training (including riding, people), must be performed in the winter. DO NOT look out the window at this time. You can see that Foghorn is being served frozen not fresh this winter. Foghorn has endured the elements like Cornelius Yukon. The Foghorn team has traveled great distances to suffer at the hands of superior foes. Foghorn has hit the ice more time than he cares to remember. Even the Donner party would say Foghorn has had a rough winter.Seeing the big thaw on the horizon, Foghorn has been working behind the scenes as well. Foghorn is rallying the movers, the shakers, the organizers: all the "little people" who make a big party happen. We think we will have a little something for everyone. So pack up the family (or whoever's kids those are), chart a course out of the city, and make plans to get your tail feathers out to New Kent County on April 10.
This year we have a new director sportif, Rayn Rock, an expert in the organizational sciences. We're throwing down a pre-ride pancake breakfast. Ann Hardy is helping out on the short course. The Brown Recluse is leading the long course. Both routes will ride neutral, regroup for lunch, then we will have the final 50k marked & flagged in case things at the front get "spirited". New FLP full timer Scottie D. is busy tooling right now with the industrial metal press and a pencil grinder on some kick-ass finishers prizes (if you are the proud owner of a New Years 50/50 bottle opener, you know what I'm talkin' bout). Doubling his salary has really been an effective motivator. "What can I do to become a pat of this historic event?" , you ask. Foghorn needs your help as well. You have 49 days to whip your poultry ass into shape (you should be ashamed of yourself, you look like shit). You need to get back to Foghorn and state your intentions. Letters of intent are being accepted, but smack is the sincerest form of flattery here, people. Call out your riding buddies, and let your mouth write a check your ass will have to cash later. All closet trainer riders must be outed!
As with all FLP events, it'll never cost more than a 6 pack to ride. More details will trickle out in the coming weeks, and I am sure Mr & Mrs Superzero over at Xtranormal will have something to say about this.
Get back to us so we can count you "IN"!
I, Foghorn Leghorn, being of sound mind and body, declare my intention to ride hard and wither just out of sight of the finish. But I'm not going down alone, I'm taking Brad (NoSho)Walter and F.o.r.d. (Found On Roadside Dead) Brandis with me!
ReplyDeleteAs for TB Tony the Browntown Recluse, well lets just say that WADA investigation into last year's "Joose-ing" incident will be well timed indeed.
Chris Mac is still pissin' in the woods!
Kevin Clark better watch his back, and when he does~boom, frame pump through the front spokes!
Scottie D. is safe, at least until I have my wings on those finisher's prizes.
Looking for enough stealth training days to join back up with the pack about 10 miles into the ride...should give me plenty o'time in the hen-house, while the rooster unwittingly soft pedals those first ten miles cuz Snowman said he had some engagement (disengagement/engagement/disengagement) to attend to in the lead up to Ferry/Roubaix - and the rooster is a kind, unwitting chap. Just hoping those wisps of pheromones don't register too early with the rooster as I pull him for the remaining 104+ miles, else things might be even more eventful than last year's inaugural romp through Vick-town.
ReplyDeleteI have a bike, I ride
ReplyDeleteShit! I just like to ride
My helmut is old
I wish my chain was gold
I like to Joose
My wheel is loose?
My helmut is old
I wish my chain was gold
I like to Joose
My wheel is loose?
I have a bike, I ride
Shit! I just like to ride
Now my story is all told
Everyone should believe in something. I believe I'll be ridin the Ferry Roubaix on 02/10/2010. WARNING! - Don't let the gray hair fool ya...
ReplyDeleteI, F.o.r.d. (First on race day), of round body and mind to be found, am IN. Alas, this aint no race... so in order to be true to my name, this has to be an all out effort for DFL. Gonna need all the help I can get - not really - so somebody please bring a bike trailer full of whatever that stuff the Brown Recluse has been drinkin, and known to share on occasion, and I'll bring a cheap bottle of cologne - in lieu of champagne, and to mask Snowalter's pheromones - and we'll christen what shall be dubbed the Joose Caboose.
ReplyDeleteI am in for the pancakes. 50/50 on the ride, depending on how the pancakes sit. I'll stir the pot up this way and see what kind of misanthropes we can muster.
ReplyDeleteWell boys hows about a little “Psycling News & Brews” coverage of the Ferry for those of us unable to attend?
ReplyDeleteBest of luck in the mountains tomorrow. River City boys vs the Rocktown crew with possible Foof in the mix and some fresh legs to boot. It should be a showdown worthy of another beer.
Swing by the shop if you need anything pre-race.
Peace,
Metro